One of Simon's feedback comments from Rough Cut 1 was to end the film on Tim's face rather than watching the van drive away. I liaised with Alex on this and he wasn't sure how he wanted to end the film just yet. As a result of this, Rough Cut 2 ends in the same way of seeing the van drive out of The Bell Inn car park. This is something I will think about while editing the second rough cut of the film.
In the first rough cut, it wasn't clear as to why Tim had a black eye in the pub and who gave it to him. I realised that's because I ended on the wrong shot. I ended on a shot of Tim and Luke after punching the owl, but in another shot we see Mollie get angry and subsequently in the next scene Tim has a black eye. To make a clearer understanding of how Tim got the black eye, I changed the last shot in scene 11 so the audience could see Mollie getting angry. Then when we see Tim in the next scene, it is more self explanatory to what has just happened. Similarly to when Mark walks up to Tim, he is a big, intimidating man and then next we see Tim with a bloody nose. The audience should be able to understand what's just happened without having to actually see a fight.
To further improve rough cut 2 I added more close ups throughout the whole film, particularly focusing on the owl punch scene. I liaised with Alex on how he wanted this scene to look as it is a big part of the film. He explained that he wanted a selection of short takes, mainly made up of close ups. The quick cuts will give more emphasis on the distressed bird, along with owl screech sound effects which will be added in the fine cut, this should look quite effective and give off the idea of panic and distress that we want. It was extremely difficult to keep the continuity of an owl constantly flapping its wings but Alex said that it shouldn't notice too much with the quick cuts. I took this onboard and continued to add in more close ups, but I made sure that the owl's wings were either up or down and the owl was facing the same way on each cut, to keep the continuity as best as I could.
 |
| Adding in more close ups |
The night scene that we include in the film is purely visual based. It shows Tim and Luke entering the Owl Academy the night after meeting Mollie and drugging one of the owls. They are dressed in black with Luke wearing a full face mask, due to the idea of sneaking into the Academy they both are reluctant to speak and instead communicate with silly hand signals. As a result of this, there wasn't any dialogue to sync with the footage. Although the night scene will be made up of atmos, rather than our actual audio we captured on the night, I still had to put a selection of our audio down to accompany the night scene as Luke walks and runs around the Academy. Usually, we would hear his footsteps on the ground and especially on the pebbled ground around the enclosures. This may not have been a problem if we hadn't already filmed there in a previous scene (where Tim and Luke make their first appearance at the Owl Academy) and had the footsteps of Mollie walking around.
The atmos that we gathered from that night is very loud due the wind that day, but luckily the sound of the footsteps, enclosure lock and gate are quite clear. I tried my best to sync the sound of the footsteps and gate as we didn't use a clapperboard that night before each take. I had to leave slightly earlier due to work on that shoot day so unfortunately I wasn't there to remind them of the clapperboard and speaking the take and scene number aloud. Due to this, I struggled similarly to Katie in the initial owl edit with syncing the audio with no clapperboard.
 |
| Adding the audio into the night scene |
 |
| Adjusting the volume level for the night scene |
Rough cut 2
Alex's notes:
- Starts a little too quickly - maybe some still GVs before Tim walks in the room? // alternatively, we could start on lots of fast cuts with opening/closing cupboard doors etc to create a sense of tension and confusion?
- Audio levels need adjusting
- Maybe end scene 1 on broken vase with J-cut?
- Scene 2 could be snappier - maybe cut earlier when Tim sits down in the van?
- Cock reveal is a bit slow - could bring the zoom in earlier
- Van reversing out needs trimming a lot - maybe on ADR day we could record dialogue to fill void here?
- Shot of Sheila opening the door was shaky - do we have another take we can use?
- Maybe stay on shot of Luke's "cat?" reaction a little longer
- Can we potentially speed up the driving away scene?
- Need something to bridge between scenes 5 and 6
- Scene 6 could be snappier - maybe cut just as they walk away?
- Nice owl GVs
- Scene 7 could be snappier - cut earlier, maybe before Mollie walks away
- Cut beginning of scene 8 - get rid of Luke's first reaction shot - feels too early
- Do we have a steadier shot of the moon?
- Maybe speed up the sign language bit
- More frantic owl action
- Tim hands Luke the leaflets twice
- Tighter shots of scene 11 - if we have the coverage
- Stick on Tim and Luke's reaction to the owl punch for longer and end on Tim's smile
- Do we have a clearer/tighter view of Tim's eye?
- There's a little creak on the table when Tim is talking - try to hide that if you can?
- Cut to wider shot as Tess walks through the door (other than that I'm happy with the shots here)
- Cut back to Luke before we see Mark - if we have the coverage - then back to Mark
- Can we stay on Mark and Tim's stare-off a little longer? (Coverage again)
- Make scene 12 a little tighter - apart from "at least we have each other" line - that is timed perfectly
Although we know we're going to re-shoot the dog hit scene, Alex still gave feedback on this part of the film. I will aim to apply this feedback to the new footage after the re-shoot:
Although we know we're going to re-shoot the dog hit scene, Alex still gave feedback on this part of the film. I will aim to apply this feedback to the new footage after the re-shoot:
- Do we have another take of the flat-pack line? - felt a little flat
- Cuts during surgery scene should be faster - more frantic
- It's not entirely clear that Tim has killed the dog - probably due to lack of coverage
- We need to see the slogan as Sheila sees it - again, probably lack of coverage
- Need something to cut to after Sheila leaves - coverage
- At no point does Sheila say where she lives - my fault - it was in an earlier version of the script
Some of his notes will be completed in the fine cut, such as:
- Driving scene does not look like driving - try layering movement
- Owl screeching noises
- Add game sound effects when Tim is on his phone - fine cut
- Pub atmos
- We need to work out an ending
Simon's notes:
- Cut on "what does it taste like?"
- Cut when we see van reveal - inside van - "cockerels really?" - then drive off
- GV’s of van in countryside
- Reverse and pull into owl academy - then drug conversation? Cut the original conversation up
Reflection
- During this edit, I reminded myself again of the importance of the clapperboard. The night scene was very difficult to sync. I blame myself for having to leave earlier for work, although I had initially scheduled the night scene for the previous day when I booked the night off, it had to be changed to the Thursday night a couple of days prior to the shoot day. Although I encountered the struggle of editing without the clapperboard, I believe that the time I put into adding the footsteps and gate sounds was worth it. By the time I had finished, it sounded very effective and more realistic now we could hear the steps and gate. The scene will be finished off well by adding clearer atmos to surround these additional sounds. This will be completed in the fine cut.
- The fact that Simon suggested to mix up the conversation with the drugs so we discover the drugs once we've pulled up in the owl academy, rather than when we are first introduced to Luke and the van, relates to my research into the rough cut from .... in a previous blog post. I found that just because the script flows from beginning to end, doesn't mean the edit will and there's nothing wrong with cutting up the scenes slightly. Although I had researched into cutting the story up, I haven't actually though about it until now when I received the feedback about mixing up the drugs conversation. I will take this into Rough Cut 3 and experiment with changing this scene up slightly.
Reflection
- During this edit, I reminded myself again of the importance of the clapperboard. The night scene was very difficult to sync. I blame myself for having to leave earlier for work, although I had initially scheduled the night scene for the previous day when I booked the night off, it had to be changed to the Thursday night a couple of days prior to the shoot day. Although I encountered the struggle of editing without the clapperboard, I believe that the time I put into adding the footsteps and gate sounds was worth it. By the time I had finished, it sounded very effective and more realistic now we could hear the steps and gate. The scene will be finished off well by adding clearer atmos to surround these additional sounds. This will be completed in the fine cut.
- The fact that Simon suggested to mix up the conversation with the drugs so we discover the drugs once we've pulled up in the owl academy, rather than when we are first introduced to Luke and the van, relates to my research into the rough cut from .... in a previous blog post. I found that just because the script flows from beginning to end, doesn't mean the edit will and there's nothing wrong with cutting up the scenes slightly. Although I had researched into cutting the story up, I haven't actually though about it until now when I received the feedback about mixing up the drugs conversation. I will take this into Rough Cut 3 and experiment with changing this scene up slightly.
No comments:
Post a Comment